Perceptions...

[tinuvial]

One of the things that I am most intrigued with these days is how others perceive me.

It's most certainly different than I perceive myself.

I never cease to be amazed at things that people "believe" about who/what I am.

I don't think that I'm a poor communicator, yet, rarely do people seem to "get" me.

That doesn't bother me, 'cause I'm a mostly self-contained unit.

But it sure puzzles me.

Ciao for now.

Comments

[sdunn711.livejournal.com]

Hey! Thanks for sending me an add request. Looking forward to reading some of your posts!

You're welcome....

[tinuvial.livejournal.com]

I know you're close to 2redpath5 (she mentions you a lot), I should have added you a long time ago. :)

Re: You're welcome....

[sdunn711.livejournal.com]

She's my best friend. Can't imagine life without her! :)

[hearthwitch.livejournal.com]

I don't think you're alone. I've been pondering this for a couple of days, and I think I've hit on some things that I want to ponder more.

1) We sabotage ourselves with science and pseudo-science: I wonder if part of the problem of motivation and perception being dramatically different is the fault of Jung and Freud and all their myriad brain children. We say "I want this for these reasons," and everyone who's had psych 102 or read a self-help novel says "Oh, but what are the real reasons that she wants that, and is *that* what she really wants?"

2) In LARP and other RP subcultures, we add a layer of complexity that confuses things even more. You have the player's wants, the character's wants, the player's "real" motivations, the character's "real" motivations, and you "win" the game by figuring out the difference between overt and covert, conscious and subconsious. Folks who are really good at RP, and folks who are really bad at RP are even harder to figure, because of the breakneck velocity of their expression of those motivations.

3) We spend an inordinate amount of time thinking about what other people are thinking, rather than listening to what they're saying. Taking something at face value is an almost alien concept.

In short, I don't think you're a poor communicator. I do think, however, that we're all guilty of thinking we know what someone else's motivations are.

Thank you...

[tinuvial.livejournal.com]

Honestly, I don't spend a lot of time thinking about what others think of me, but it's become an issue at work, of late. Management is vexed at me because I honestly simply don't care how others perceive me. I have asked if my performance is an issue, and have been assured it is not, however, I "annoy my coworkers." This drove me to the GA DOL site, where I was reassured to find out that annoying your co-workers is not a termination offense unless you 'willfully and maliciously continue behavior that you have been asked to cease and desist.' I have asked my boss how I can change, and they can't tell me what behavior to modify, so I've just determined I will take the "f*ck if they can't take a joke" approach. OK, this was longer than I intended, but I wanted to give you insight on where this whole post came from.